‘Hayride To Hell’ Review: A Suitable Yet Niche Spooky Season Serve

On the surface, Hayride to Hell is the eye-catcher of the year for horror fans, especially of the slasher variety. Plastered on the front of the poster and every bit of promotional material is Bill Moseley and Kane Hodder, both of whom have enjoyed an extensive cult following in the subgenre, as well as for their own works.

If you aren’t familiar with the two of them, Moseley is known primarily for his role in The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, as well as House of 1000 Corpses and The Devil’s Rejects. Hodder infamously portrayed Jason Voorhees in the Friday the 13th franchise, in addition to supplanting roles that have built him a respectable base of ravenous fans.

Naturally, the two horror icons teaming up to take on a film together is a no-brainer for anyone with a remote interest in the sort. Hayride to Hell is the distilled, simplified essence of a deep passion for horror. It looks, feels, and breathes Halloween; whether or not it’s actually good is out of the question. This is a necessary watch for slasher fans this spooky season.

Bill Moseley plays a disgruntled local farmer who runs an annual haunted hayride. Raging against town officials who want to take his land and repurpose it, Moseley utilizes a minuscule group of supportive townspeople to fight back in expectedly horrific fashion.

Hodder, funnily enough, plays a good guy this time around… sort of. He’s a half-corrupt police officer more worried about the complimentary caramel apples than the fight over Moseley’s farm. Yet his presence alone moves the film along in a positive direction, and he and Moseley score a few spectacular interactions that showcase all the reasons they’re deeply loved in the horror community.

But as the villain, Moseley wins out here as the heavy highlight. He doesn’t do much beyond what he has in the past, but the grumpy old man who’s just “had it up to here” works as well as it ever has anywhere, here. The film is worth a watch for him alone.

But as far as the film itself goes, a lot of the technicalities and cosmetics are simply lacking. There are a few gnarly displays of tactical special effects, and for those, bravo. But for the most part, the film just looks unremarkable.

Transitions are tacky, the camera rarely moves, and the envelope is never once pushed. This thing is a machine for the performers – again, that’s going to work for the right crowd. But for a wider, more general group, there may not be enough here to warrant the whole ride.

The screenplay, too, serves as an engine to get Moseley and Hodder at the front and center as much as possible. Moseley’s inclusion feels a tad bit more natural, but even so, it’s strikingly clear when the clock has run out and they’re meant to be back on screen.

To that point, all the supporting cast is made worse for it. Weak performances stick out in their anemic time on screen and the good ones feel underused for the same reason. Your enjoyment of this one will truly come down to how involved you are on the deep horror scene.

It’s difficult to slot this one anywhere but down the middle, as a result. If you’re a fan of the genre, you should check it out and form your own opinion either way. Fans of Moseley and Hodder should have a great time, and those looking for a suitably spooky in-season watch will find it. Hop on the Hayride to Hell. But if you’re looking for something truly moving or challenging, skip town and search elsewhere.