Ever since 1989, when Tim Burton blessed us with his schmaltzy but sumptuous vision of Batman, there has been a running list of the best worst comic book movies ever. They’re not underrated because they flopped at the box office. Conversely, they aren’t overrated because they sucked wind at the box office. These are the “worst” comic book movies ever made for many reasons.
Maybe, it was the ham-handed CGI or other graphics that were circa-1974 hilarious to watch? It could have been the script that reads like a junior high school standardized test. If the characters were any more campy, young Boy Scouts were roast marshmallows over their Wal-Mart leotards. Whatever the case, how they made the list, ask any nerd about guilty pleasures they would defend these films in a high-pitched and broken voice; only dogs could hear the debate.
That’s what makes these “The Best, Worst” CBMs. Any other movie that looked like these would be enough to boycott. However, they are each wonderful in their way.
Some own DVDs of these flicks; others make it a stop-down whenever a movie on this hallowed list is on TV. You’re ashamed you like them, but don’t feel alone. The odds are many of your geckaphile friends have a copy of this tucked behind the Star Wars collection in Mom’s basements.
Before we begin with this list, a movie begs to be shared but didn’t quite make the mark. Sure, it’s a skosh subjective, but it inspired what Marvel could do with the big greenie meanie, The Incredible Hulk.
This is Edward Norton, who was done dirty by the entire advent of the MCU. Sure, Liv Tyler wasn’t that convincing. Tim Roth was so underrated. And William Hurt needed someone to trim that hamster on his upper lip throughout the movie.
But this film deserved so much better than what it received from the studio and the fans.
Trust one thing: If this movie did not come out one month before Iron Man, the MCU buzz would have certainly supported this film, and we may have never seen the soft Professor Hulk. (Although Mark Ruffalo was so good in The Avengers.)
Edward Norton even prepared a trilogy of his vision for Hulk, but of course, the obligatory “creative differences” got in the way. Unfortunately, we will never know if we would like him when he’s angry unless you watch Fight Club.
Here are the Top 10 best…worst comic book movies ever.
10. The Punisher (2004)
It took Hollywood a while to get this right (see the dynamic Jon Bernthal in the Netflix series for the finish line). It seems like they were on the “Fantastic Four Payment Plan,” but how hard can this be? Even in the early oughts, Marvel could have placed a little more machismo with the Frank Castle character, couldn’t they?
The Thomas Jane portrayal in 2004 was refreshing and based upon Garth Ennis’ “Welcome back, Frank” storyline. There was characterization, depth, and other nuances that weren’t seen in much of the comics and certainly not in Dolph Lundgren’s hack version.
Speaking of hacks, John Travolta starred in the role of villain Howard Saint. (I know, right?!) While he does have skills as a villain with a good script (see Face/Off), Vinny Barbarino should have stuck this script up his nose with a rubber hose. However, Jane? He’s worth a second watch.
9. The Rocketeer (1991)
Back to the future, The Rocketeer is one of the most forgotten CBMs in history. Even Disney seems to have forgotten about it because the movie barely made the staunch line-up in the first year of their plus streamer. If you are thinking, “How is this one of the best worst comic book movies?” Well, two words: Joe Johnston. Yes, as in the director of Captain America: The First Avenger.
Many nerds either don’t know about this movie, disqualify it because it was rated PG, or did not consider a CBM because they can’t find the comic. Well, it’s from IDW and Dave Stevens. This Disney movie was a charming film starring Billy Campbell and Jennifer Connelly. They knew this script provided a wholesome purpose and delivered it. Just because there isn’t Michael Bay explosion porn and dazzling CGI does not imply the film sucked. The Rocketeer may have a little, but it’s still worth some time in front of your TV.
8. Spider-Man 3 (2007)
Sam Raimi‘s sequel to his CBM coming-out party is undeniably one of the best comic book movies of all time. And then, he had to push the envelope a little more with Spider-Man 3. This was a calamitous fart-and-fall-down moment that slapped nerds across the face.
Who knew this would feature an Emo Tobey Maguire and a guy (Topher Grace) who stole a Venom outfit at one of those pop-up Halloween shops? The third of the series was the least of them, but if you loved Sam Raimi’s offerings, there is a soft spot in your geek heart for this one, despite its defects.
This movie is the perfect example of “Going Extra” — extra baddies, extra love interests, extra haircuts, extra dance-offs. Somehow, this sequel was so abysmal that it opened the door for Andrew Garfield (and hurled Tobey through a window). Yet, admit it, instead of hitting the treadmill, you will hit the couch if this ever is seen on television.
7. Green Lantern (2011)
A movie so unbelievably meh that even its star, Ryan Renyolds, roasted it to a lovely burnt char in Deadpool 2. (Not that he’s much of an expert on quality CBMs. X-Men Origins: Wolverine anyone?) He wasn’t wrong, though. Green Lantern was meant to launch the DCEU with this movie. And then people went to see it. Suffice to say, the only thing this film launched was a fan base’s gag reflex.
It wasn’t good. The graphics were “creating-effects-with-paint-by-numbers” bad. Then, there was the perfunctory mo-cap of Parallax’s gaping mouth, suck-your-soul-dry weapon. And then there was whatever the hell they did to Peter Sarsgaard’s head. The film was slated to splash with a hefty roster that included Tim Robbins, Angela Bassett, Geoffrey Rush, and Michael Clarke Duncan. C’mon! The most unfortunate thing of the entire movie was the post-credit scene when Mark Strong puts on the gold ring of fear and truly becomes Sinestro. And then, we never got to see the damn thing take place!
Yeah, that would have been great. Hey, Ryan got a wife out of the deal, so what does he care? Everything notwithstanding, many nerds own this movie (and hide it when friends come over). The fact they do acknowledge this and do not tell anyone makes this one of the best worst comic book movies out there.
6. X-Men: Apocalypse (2016)
Before anyone complains, how did this movie do for Oscar Issac‘s career? It seems if it is a nerd movie, that dude is first in line for a role. This movie wasn’t half as bad as people say. Underwhelming? Definitely. But bad? Not so much. Yes, this film lies a little flatter than most X-Men films in this extensive franchise, but it’s not nearly as bad as people portray it to be. The most troubling thing about Apocalypse is the money left on the table.
These characters and their back story needed a whole other hour to dig into for interest. We could have been given a work of art with this plot. Still, instead of global domination from some forgotten Egyptian deity, we get a cantankerous old fart who argues that macaroni-and-cheese is cold at the family reunion. The action picks up toward the movie’s end, and Issac as En Sabah Nur begins to unfold his diabolical plan. But by then, it’s a little too late when Jean Grey (Sophie Turner) starts to levitate and scorch the planet.
Nonetheless, despite the fallbacks, plotholes, and crammed lines (and there are plenty), this film is a substantial piece of connective tissue in this franchise, even if that tissue is used primarily to blow the director’s nose.
5. Watchmen (2009)
Without debate, the Watchmen graphic novel by the supreme scribe Alan Moore is often called one of the best literary works of all time. Regretfully, the origin material is so complex and multifaceted that even the most accepting and loyal fans didn’t think it could ever be made into a film. And Zack Snyder, with the heart of a nerd and the mind of a savant, was determined to prove everyone wrong. And a staggering $100 million later, it depends on whom you ask if he accomplished that goal.
I once read the great Peter Travers of Rolling Stone wrote: “Watchmen is a cinematic piñata getting whacked from every side.” I never forgot that description because it makes sense to those who loved the film and understand the comic. Each time the film takes a whack at this alternative universe of vigilante superheroes, more rays are shed in the dark corners to give us more of the story. Throughout the three-hour run time, you begin to understand what a tall task was by Snyder to bring it to light. And despite the arguments against this movie, Watchmen is quite the illumination among all the best worst comic book movies.
4. Daredevil (2003)
This is a polarizing film. Some people love this film outright, in the open, and without shame. Others, more loyal to canon, hate it and find it laughable that the man who would become Batfleck was Matt Murdoch. That schism among DC fandom is enough to qualify Daredevil as one of the best worst comic book movies ever. Since 2003, this argument still can browbeating, crotch kicking, and spew a few expletives.
Most fans aren’t aware of a Director’s Cutthat adds 30 additional minutes to the movie. It’s not that the film lacks veritas–it has fighting and decent scenes (outside of whatever the hell happened in that playground). Maybe it’s a thing with DC and WB movies because Ben Affleck got himself a (former) wife out of this movie. Therein lies an issue from the original theatrical cut. This film was wrought with campy emotion, cutesy flirting, and the random booty call with Elektra (Jennifer Garner).
The Director’s Cut is far better because most of the mush is understated, and it seems Frank Miller stopped by because it has his sense to it. Also, Michael Clarke Duncan is an understated Kingpin. A young Colin Farrell as Bullseye is better than you think (although still not great). He didn’t get much love in this role, but he should have.
3. Dredd (2012)
This much-needed reboot doesn’t even compare to the cheesebox, farcical Judge Dredd starring Sylvester Stallone and Rob Schnieder. Shoot, those codpiece outfits designed by (no kidding) Gianni Versace would have been fabulous in a strip club, but in this movie? No. It took almost two decades to produce a realistic vision of what John Wagner and Carlos Ezquerra created in the late ’70s.
Some who aren’t familiar with this much better but still often maligned film is a young Karl Urban is Judge Dredd. Yes, Bones from Star Trek and Billy Butcher in The Boys. And he’s precisely what this comic created. This was a harsh depiction of the dystopia the Judges were established to rule. The script wasn’t full of slapstick schmaltz; it was unpretentious and true-to-life at least, what life would have been like there in Mega-City One.
Also, if you’re so inclined to revisit this movie to discover why this would be considered one of the best worst comic book movies ever, pay attention to the villain. She’s a sinister drug lord who goes by Ma-Ma. And if she looks familiar, she should. It’s Lena Headey of Game of Thrones fame. And she is a dark, vile woman. Sounds familiar, huh?
2. Hulk (2003)
Hear us out. This Ang Lee adaptation of Hulk demands its respect on this list of the best worst comic book movies because most fans won’t watch it based on what they heard or from whom they heard it. What Lee did was treat this script with a glance into a man’s life instead of the anti-heroic view of a monster. Lee’s name and pedigree alone give this movie the credit it never received. The guy directed Life of Pi, Brokeback Mountain, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, and Sense and Sensibility. Shouldn’t that warrant ignore what you heard and view with an open mind?
Eric Bana does an admirable job as the confused Dr. Bruce Banner. He gave this role the belief it needed to take Lee’s script seriously. It’s almost Freudian because Bana takes us on a journey of his past and pent-up rage. The views we get about Banner rationalize what he fights daily. He is running from something he can’t escape. That basis is why the action seems delayed. After all, this is a movie of origin — if only they shared the complete story.
This rendition of the Hulk won’t ever compete for graphics, score, and the faulty “smashes,” but this is a movie. Before comic entertainment studios understood what to do, Marvel turned to a real storyteller to tell this one.
1. Flash Gordon (1980)
Those who know are cheering and fist-pumping—those who do not are moaning in mystery. Let’s be clear about this adaption of the fabled Alex Raymond comic strip: This movie is a laughable mess–a glorious, celebratory, and righteous mess that should lead a list about the best worst comic book movies ever. And it goes without saying, but when you have a complete soundtrack by Queen!? Please. As if anything could dethrone this phenomenal campfest of testosterone and tomfoolery.
Flash Gordon transforms from one of the first superheroes in 1934 to lead us all into this intergalactic glam sci-fi extravaganza that would become an instant cult classic that still holds up in hilarity and action happenstance today. The man with his football nickname emblazoned on his chest is Sam J. Jones, formerly seen as Bo Derek’s husband in 10. Two cast members are proven gems in geekdom, Max Von Sydow as Ming the Merciless and Brian Blessed (truly one of the best voices in cinematic history) as the Hawkmen General.
This Mike Hodges apparition influenced by a vivid imagination and probably a candy jar full of edibles become as “out-of-this-world” it gets for a sci-fi caper. The movie features attire, so lousy model show stupid that even Project Runway’s Tim Gunn would stress they were a bit much. See for yourself as Blessed lends his dulcet tones and leads his men in perfect flying fashion.
It’s a cornucopia of panache and a megalomaniacal traffic jam of joy. Freddie Mercury’s vision of an operatic overtone lends itself to the greatness of this cacophonous jewel and visual orgasmic nerd glee. Despite the bedazzled leotards, this film is immersive, green screen chaos, and even a space ho. (Ming’s daughter is quite tawdry.) Yet, the flaws and frivolity make this movie like a geek tractor beam. It’s a train wreck. You can’t look…and quote the lines as you go.
Featured Image Source: DNA Films/Peach Trees/Reliance Big Entertainment
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Since he saw ‘Dune’ in the $1 movie theater as a kid, this guy has been a lover of geek culture. It wasn’t until he became a professional copywriter, ghostwriter, and speechwriter that he began to write about it (a lot).
From the gravitas of the Sith, the genius of Tolkien and C.S. Lewis, or the gluttony of today’s comic fan, SPW digs intelligent debate about entertainment. He’s also addicted to listicles, storytelling, useless trivia, and the Oxford comma. And, he prefers his puns intended.
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Maybe, it was the ham-handed CGI or other graphics that were circa-1974 hilarious to watch? It could have been the script that reads like a junior high school standardized test. If the characters were any more campy, young Boy Scouts were roast marshmallows over their Wal-Mart leotards. Whatever the case, how they made the list, ask any nerd about guilty pleasures they would defend these films in a high-pitched and broken voice; only dogs could hear the debate.
