If you grew up like me, it’s likely that the Pop-Tart has had a major, formative impact on your life. It affects the way you think, and the way you eat. You’ve probably thought to yourself hundreds of times after eating something that you’d have rather been eating a Pop-Tart. With an impact like this, any film involving the delicious pastry is likely to bring some high expectations. Add in comedic legend Jerry Seinfeld as the writer, director, and star, and the bar is set even higher, especially after some recent comments made by Seinfeld about the lack of bite in the current state of comedy. He had to immediately put his money where his mouth is with the imminent release of Unfrosted, a straight-to-Netflix picture telling the fictitious tale of how the Pop-Tart came to be..
The film boasts performances from a handful of familiar comic actors who star alongside Seinfeld, with Jim Gaffigan, Amy Schumer, and Melissa McCarthy being the most prominent supporting characters. They each play different folks high up at Kellogg’s and Post as they desperately race each other to create the first toaster pastry that could revolutionize breakfast.

The setup aptly satirizes the space race of the 1960s between the Soviet Union and the United States, even bringing Melissa McCarthy’s Donna Stankowski from the space food development department of NASA to help out. To them, this is life and death. Each company pulls out all the stops to win, which allows the film to bring in a host of cameos and smaller roles that will at least get a smile out of the most critical viewer. Unfortunately, the weak link here is Jerry himself. His acting works well in the sitcom style, but he isn’t very compelling even in film roles he writes for himself. A more seasoned actor might have been able to improve the comedic delivery of Seinfeld’s script.
Unfrosted has some funny bits and gags that really work, but those are sadly few and far between. The over-the-top nature the film is going for feels more like a late 90’s or early 00’s children’s film except this one has some swearing and innuendo. There are films where hyperbolic energy catapults a script to grand heights, and this type of humor is effective in the right hands. The way Seinfeld and crew utilize it here gives off more ridiculousness than they might have intended. Ultimately, it seems as if Seinfeld wrote this for a few key jokes without much thought to the rest of the movie. This is a shame considering the volume of brand biopics we’ve gotten over the last couple of years, it would have been amazing to have an effective satire of the subgenre. Films like Blackberry have taken more comedic routes on their way to telling a mostly true story, with no one quite leaning into full satire just yet.

Similar to other movies that go straight to streamers, there’s something off about the way Unfrosted looks. Some sort of glossiness is over every shot that just doesn’t sit right. This is no indictment on the production design, which is actually one of the few bright spots. The lab setup for the creation of the Pop Tart looks good and is a great playground for putting together visual gags that occasionally work. Other than this, there is little to recommend visually.
Jerry Seinfeld’s directorial debut is a huge disappointment that is unfunny, unmemorable, and unnecessary, with the only outstanding thing about it being the ensemble cast he assembled. There are a few solid laughs sprinkled throughout the otherwise dull script, but nothing to overcome the undercooked story and jokes that make up the majority of the runtime.
Unfrosted is currently available to stream on Netflix.

Jerry Seinfeld's directorial debut is a huge disappointment that is unfunny, unmemorable, and unnecessary, with the only outstanding thing about it being the ensemble cast he assembled. There are a few solid laughs sprinkled throughout the otherwise dull script, but nothing to overcome the undercooked story and jokes that make up the majority of the runtime.
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GVN Rating 2.1
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Proud owner of three movie passes. Met Harrison Ford at a local diner once. Based in Raleigh, NC.